what I do not want to tell you

This Sunday, our pastor reminded us how we all, in fact, have these wicked hearts and that is not going anywhere. Anything good that is in me, in my actions? It is not me at all. It is Jesus. So here I am, with confessions to make because I want you to know me — just like I want to know you.

And I am sorry — for trying to make you believe impressions and not the whole truth about my heart. I’m sorry for not making space for the whole of your heart, either.

choosing mercy, extending grace

Because the only way to make it in the darkness of this world, is to hold to hope. Not just for us but for others, too. We shelter that hope, choosing mercy and extending grace — trusting that the One who made us, can make something good out of these circumstances, too.

glimpses of grace, vol. 3

Monday morning, fingers frozen numb.

This Sunday, I am turning 23. This Sunday, after a very stressful and busy spring in the University, I finally get to figure out once again what this thing called free time is as I am finishing up some courses. I am finding that space to breathe, and time to stop and be in awe of the beautiful creation of our beautiful Creator.

These days, I am walking and wondering if I am leaving a mark anywhere at all as I go. Yet, I keep coming back to these words that God spoke to me at the beginning of this year — that this year, I would be walking from suffering to glory. I still have no idea what exactly this means.

But what I know is that these days, I am learning to trust the Lord to go before me. He is there, making me able when I am too tired. He is there, weaving hope into my heart when all I see is a hopeless, unchanging circumstance. He is there, loving me as I am but graciously changing me for the better.

All I can say is, we serve an awesome God.

Some goodness found on the web:

When You Feel Wounded By Your Own by Ann Voskamp. Once again, these words spoke grace right into my heart: “Yeah, it may not feel like it — but you are seen… how you just keep keeping your chin up and living brave through the hurt and how you keep taking one step out of bed and another step through the door — and how you keep scaling mountains by relentlessly taking steps forward. But I wanted you to know — your wounds are seen and it’s okay.”

50 Ways to Serve Others. Jesus told us in Mark 9:35, “If anyone desires to be first, he shall be last of all and servant of all.” So let us start serving others, and here are 50 great ways to do just that.

On that note, this read on 4 Lessons on Biblical Hospitality is a good one. I love the story of Martha and Mary — and it is one to remind me over and over again that our service needs to stem from fellowship with the Lord. Heart checks are so important because pride has a way of telling us that our service itself is more important than anything else.

How to Recover the Lost Art of Dying: What Kara Tippetts Taught Us. Because everything about this is true and sad and beautiful.

Can there really be purpose in our pain? This is something I have been thinking about lately, as going through difficult times sometimes has me wondering about the purpose of this all, of my existence and staying where I am. Meredith writes about the purpose in our pain and whatever we are going through right now, and she does it with such grace.